Happy Birthday America

Soooo….this is about a month late.  HAHA oh well.
But Alex threw us a fourth of July party–he’s so incredibly good at hosting it’s ridiculous.  Hosting makes me nervous sometimes, cuz I’m so not used to doing it (my home home in Wilmette is too cluttered that my mom didn’t really want to have a whole lot of guests except for close friends because it wasn’t really presentable…we’d have to clean for a few days before family could even come over for Thanksgiving or Christmas!).  But Alex does a fabulous job.  In fact, he even invited me over for dinner yesterday!  It was a lot of fun–cooking and such.  And it felt like such a good….I dunno.  It was just kinda homey…you know what I mean?  lol  Alex put a pork roast in the oven (cooked to perfection!  not pink at all!), he made some mashed potatoes, and then I brought over some veggies.  And Barney cooked a reallllly good chocolate chip banana bread.  Yum!!  I really like cooking and eating with people 🙂  Anyway…back to July fourth!

So it was….Jess Chu, Carrie, Amy, Alex, Hyden, Tom, James, Barney, Phil…is that it?  I think I’m missing a guy.  Dan Choi!  (who, by the way, has started everyone saying my name like Jennayyy ala Forest Gump…*cough*)  So we played some games…water balloon toss (it ended up being Jess and I vs. I think Barney and…Tom?  I don’t remember…but we came in second both times!), three legged race.  And then we played Mafia while Alex and his dad cooked up some burgers for us 🙂  Because Dan, Barney and Phil could tell when I was Mafia, it ended up being a leeetle bit insulting!  lol  Dan said something like I ask dumb questions when I’m Mafia (which is actually COMPLETELY true!  I ask questions that I know the answer to–like who died?–to throw ppl off.  But sometimes I just really do forget who we killed!! lol), but he meant I play smarter when I’m not Mafia.  Makes sense, cuz I’m actually trying to help us all figure out who’s the killer by then.  lol  And then at one point I was accused of being Mafia, but because the Mafia had killed Barney off first (I think Jess suggested it, and I just shrugged and said okay), I tried to play it off that I wasn’t Mafia, because I’d never kill of Barney first.  True true!  Because I know he loves to play and for some reason everyone loves to kill off barney.  lol  Because of that Phil, who’s prettttyyy darn clever, told everyone that he was accusing me, because even though Mafia killed off Barney, I’m pretty “submissive”–and then a big uproar ensued.  lol  It’s weird to think that being submissive is such a terrible thing in America–we’re all about asserting independence and leadership abilities…but I think the next Bible Study we did was all about submitting to Christ and loving others.  it was funny to see Phil flounder though and try to come up with a new, less stigmatized word…he ended up saying that I was accomodating, and that just because Barney was killed off first didn’t necessarily mean that I wasn’t Mafia.  Because of those three (mostly Phil and Barney who spoke in their secret ways) I got killed off a lot.  LOL  THANKS.  They seem to know me too well…i don’t know how, but I guess they’ve played with me enough and studied my ways enough to know.  Although I can lie to other people just fine!  lol  Tom was so upset with me when he found out I’d lied to his face about being Mafia.  HAHAHAAA  I felt so bad after that!

It was a lot of fun though.  🙂

And you know what?  About Craisin, I really don’t think that I’m interested in him anymore.  Kinda sad, because it’s like the end of an era or something, but it’s kind of freeing.  That’s not to say that I’m not awkward around him anymore–I think that’ll take a little more time.  I don’t exactly know what happened, but I just don’t see him a whole lot anymore, and it’s hard to get to know him when you dont.  And besides that, I guess it’s just being a senior now, and everything that comes with that.

I went out to dinner with all the senior girls from church and Peggy, who we hadn’t met up with in AGES…and we talked about that.  lol  I remember being bitter at Peggy Junior Year (of highschool–i can’t believe i have to clarify!!)  and writing a narrative about it in AP English, because I felt like she really dropped the ball on discipling me, hence, I never considered her as my discipler even though she tried.  It was hard for us though, with her going to Mongolia and all that, and I never really needed/relied on her as much as like…Sarah, who called her at 2am many nights and things like that.  I just never connected with her in that way.  And even now, I know that she cares a lot about us as a class, bc we were the first group of girls that she taught, but as an individual, I still don’t really feel like we have that personal connection.  And that’s okay, I’m fine with it.  I really was pleasantly surprised to find that there wasn’t any residual bitterness or anything like that.

But we all talked about an update of our lives (i told them all about my family, and major changes to bio, guys, etc), and we’d all made a pact our freshman year to each put $5 into a pot every New Years Day for as long as we were single, and then I think the last person to get married gets the pot.  lol  I think it was semi consolation for being the last one (even though everyone swears they wont be the first one to get hitched. lol  Personally, I think it’s going to be Michelle or Natalie cuz they’re both in serious relationships that I have no doubt will last.  So we shared about boys, of course.  lol

And I think, being from Northwestern (where literally one of the first things that I learned about NU was that it has a terrible dating scene!), I’m not really so worried.  I think it was New Student Week when I picked up one of our campus magazines and that was the cover story.  Good warning…crush their hopes early.  LOL  And so being a senior, with one year left, unless something happened fall or winter quarter, I cant really see anything starting up that would be serious.  I mean, of course I can’t predict things like this, but I’m just fine with graduating single!  Of course I have my girl moments, but in the long run, I’m comfortable with that.  And I really think if God gave me this innate desire…or heart for marriage, he’s either going to have someone out there for me, or he’s going to do something way more incredible in my life than I can even imagine.  A lot of times people who are single…celebate, that is, set apart for God alone….there’s a lot of things that they can do with their lives for God that married couples (especially those with families) can’t necessarily do quite as easily.  So I think I would be okay.  I think for sure I would still be sad if I’m single and forty, but again, I know that God would have great things in store.  And that’s really comforting to know. 🙂

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